Grigory Lukin.com

“If you’re not with us, you’re against us. Huh. If you’re not an apple, you’re a banana…”
Terry Pratchett, “Thud!”

I’m a bad atheist. I don’t read all the trendy atheist blogs, I don’t subscribe to “freethinker” magazines, I rarely attend rallies and I don’t keep up on atheism-related current affairs. That’s why this article on Atheism+ came as such a surprise. At first, I couldn’t quite believe what I’d just read. Then I spent several minutes staring at the screen and muttering “no no no no no”…

Why? Read the article to get a quick 411 on the issue. The tl;dr version is as follows: a number of prominent atheists designed a movement “for people to discuss how religion affects everyone and to apply skepticism and critical thinking to everything, including social issues like sexism, racism, GLBT issues, politics, poverty, and crime.” (source) What exactly does this mean? In the words of the blogger Greta Christina, it’s quite simple: 

I am not saying that atheists who don’t care about social justice are not true atheists. I’m saying that atheists who don’t care about social justiceshould care about social justice. Logically, and morally. (source)

Sounds mostly harmless, right? PZ Myers, arguably the Internet’s most prominent atheist blogger, clarifies it further in this brief but poignant kinda-sorta-not-really FAQ: The movement “is only starting to coalesce. There are no leaders, no organization behind it, no money, no coercive power at all. It’s entirely spontaneous. Currently it’s little more than a label. […] There’s no religious mentality at all in Atheism+” but “[p]eople who are embracing Atheism+ as a label think atheism ought to similarly incorporate social values.” (Conformity doesn’t sound like religion at all…)

If you think that simply not believing in God is enough to be an atheist, “that’s just stupid. There are lots of atheists who take this blinkered stance that atheism is just one specific idea about rejecting god-belief, and it has absolutely no philosophical foundation and should have no political or social consequences.” 

In response to the accusation of a “you’re either with us or against us” mentality, Dr.Myers assures us that “[i]t’s entirely opt-in.” My favorite part is where he says that “If you agree with that [ Atheism ought to be a progressive social movement in addition to being a philosophical and scientific position, because living in a godless universe means something to humanity.], you’re an atheist+. … And if you don’t agree with any of that — and this is the only ‘divisive’ part — then you’re an asshole.”

To sum this up, if you don’t want to be an activist atheist and if mere lack of belief in God is enough for you, you’re “just stupid.” And if you don’t want to join the cool kids’ club, even if you have reservations and valid arguments, you’re an asshole. Either with us or against us. Black and white. Duality. Fallacy. Not a good way to make friends or convert the undecided, especially when addressing the people who encounter more than enough hate and ignorance on daily basis as it is.

What’s my take on it? I’m an atheist and I’m a progressive person – I believe in equal pay, equal rights, the right to marry whomever you want, etc. I volunteer in my community, go to political protests to fight the good fight and will vote for the progressive presidential candidate in November. With that said, I do not want to be part of the Atheism+ movement. Why? Because I don’t need to join a movement in order to continue doing what I already do. Because I will gain nothing from joining their group. Because it would be redundant – I’ve been a progressive atheist for a long, long time before they came along and I’ve been doing just fine. Because I shall not join any group whose spokesperson (and that’s what Dr.Myers is) sees his constituency in black and white and uses petty schoolyard insults to insult those who dare disagree, regardless of their motivation. 

There are many other reasons – this is just off the top of my head. I support efforts to educate the public about atheism. Hell, I even wrote an e-book for that very purpose! I do not support divisive tactics and “with us or against us” ultimatums. I agree that there are atheists who are bigoted, close-minded or not very bright, but to paint all of your opposition in one color and declare them to be stupid assholes? That’s just ridiculous. I’ve just realized one final – and biggest – reason I shall never join any atheist organization that uses divisive tactics or otherwise limits its membership: any sufficiently large organization loses its focus and becomes corrupt. The Catholic church and its pedophile scandals. The Democratic party and their willingness to compromise on torture. Even charities aren’t immune – here’s a list of the 25 highest-paid charity CEOs. It’s entropy, pure and simple. It’s inevitable. Show me a single large organization that’s been around for a few decades and hasn’t succumbed to corruption. Show me just one. Atheism+ is just another such organization: a group with admittedly noble motives and undeniably foul-mouthed champions; a movement that divides as it attempts to unite; a good idea poorly executed.

I wish Atheism+ the best of luck but I won’t be joining them. I agree with their long-term goals but I won’t be associated with George W Bush impersonators. I’ll just keep doing my progressive work by myself, thank you very much. But then again, what do I know? I’m just a stupid asshole.

Right now, I’m on a sabbatical from work to decompress, catch up on my sleep and maybe – just maybe – find a better job. Two weeks down, four to go and no luck so far. Filling out applications and going to interviews takes up surprisingly little time, so I spent most of the last two weeks reliving my childhood by playing Diablo-2. (I shall not buy the abomination that is Diablo-3 until it becomes accessible in the offline, single-player mode.) Unfortunately, it is possible to have too much of a good thing. In other words, I got bored.

I’m still trying to figure out the exact set of conditions I need to get in a writing mood. Not just any writing mood, mind you, but the kind of mood where I sit down and type up an entire e-book in one night. The “all or nothing” kind of mood. Well, it looks like boredom and restlessness are vital ingredients of this strange headspace of mine. That, combined with a complete lack of anything productive to do, finally gave me the push to pull one of my infamous all-nighters. All it took was a can of NOS (260mg of caffeine, the equivalent of 3.25 cans of RedBull), a bunch of fried eggs&pasta (a recipe I invented, as far as I know), and a mix of TPachelbel Canon in D Major, theme music for Discworld Noir and all the techno Pandora has to offer playing in the background. It took me 10 hours but I finished editing one of my less known e-books and completed a brand new one! (And there was much rejoicing.)

I just need to add a few final touches and then Taoism-101: Answers and Explanations will be unleashed on the Internets! Yep, that there was one productive all-nighter.

Today begins my five-day-long promotion: I’m giving away my e-book “Go to college without going broke.” If you’re reading this, you probably followed the link at the end of the book – well, I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Can you do me a favor? Click on the link and leave a quick review, preferably one with four or five stars. *g*

Why am I giving it away? I’d be lying if I said my intentions are purely altruistic: the sales could use a little boost, and I’m anticipating a small spike in profits once this promotion ends. Aside from that, though, I really do wish to help all the college students out there. I wish I had a guide like this when I went to college… The information in my book is hardly unique – I’m sure most of it can be found online. However, if I know anything at all about human psychology, it’s that people would rather download (and hopefully read at some point) something that’s being given away for free than do their own research. Heh…

The first time I did this promotion, back in January, I gave away over 15,000 downloads. Here is hoping it’ll generate the same interest this time. If even a hundred people follow my advice and save at least $1,000 each, I’ll be a happy camper. Enjoy!

This is one of those few times when I hope nobody ever reads my blog, because otherwise I’d be reducing my chances to win this great prize. Lyn from Mrs.Goff’s Pre-K Tales is giving away a $50 Starbucks giftcard to celebrate her 50th blog post. Click here to enter.

You know you need to update your site more often when a widget you’ve been trying to add for over a year gets discontinued – and you’re the last person to find out. A while ago, when I first started this site, I dreamed of glory and riches (it’s just the riches now) and tried to add Google Friend Connect to my page. Unfortunately, that wasn’t meant to be, which is why the only way to get updates from my site is a very nearly anachronistic email subscription. (I’m pretty sure the concept of email updates is over 20 years old.)

Oddly enough, a whopping 22 people must have been bored enough to subscribe for email notifications. Fast-forward to today, a lazy April Sunday: I got into that rare state of mind that motivates me to clean my apartment, update my resume or do something equally time-consuming and objectively useless. I decided to give GFC another try and lo and behold! – I found an easy way to install the widget. The only problem is that Google disabled it over a month ago to force people to switch over to Google+. Kind of a low move on their part… I’m sure at this point Google knows me better than anybody else in the world, what with them keeping a detailed search history of pretty much every person who’s ever been online, but starting a G+ account feels like giving in completely. It’s bad enough that I have a Facebook addiction – I don’t have time for yet another evil multibillion corporation!

*le sigh* Chances are, I’ll submit to our digital overlords and join their network eventually, but for now I’m going to keep looking for another way to create a network of followers. GFC was so convenient and easy to use. Perhaps most importantly, it wasn’t needy. It never used to bombard me with email notifications or ask if I’d like to install yet another new update. It just worked – simple as that. I’m going to go out on a limb here and assume that there’ll be a fair number of bloggers who won’t switch to G+ when GFC finally gets shut down. (For some reason, it’s still running – you just can’t sign up for a new account.) This may be one of those rare instances when Google made a mistake that will cost them traffic and revenue. Why fix something that wasn’t broken, Google?..

They’re both being given away, that’s what! Nicole Marie is giving away a pair of pearl earrings over here (the deadline to enter is April 19th), and Plushka of Plushka Craft fame is giving away a handmade stuffed owl. Her giveaway ends on the 20th, so there’s no rush. Click here to enter it, and may the odds be ever in your favor! (But not really – I kind of want to win both of those.) 

(Because everything is better with two exclamation marks.) I’ve just spent a couple of hours entering dozens of giveaways – I can think of far worse and less productive ways to spend my weekend. If you’re too lazy to look for giveaways yourself, you’re in luck! Here are three great giveaways:

Claire from “Bless My Nest” is giving away a set of “What to Expect When Expecting” books. The odds look pretty good right now, so enter it quick! It ends tomorrow. Go here to enter.

Peggy of “PJH Designs” fame is giving away a $25 gift card to Home Depot, also known as Depository of Random Awesomeness. The giveaway ends in less than 48 hours, so you might want to hurry. Go thataway to enter.

And last but definitely not least, Tracy from “Owl Be Craftin'” is giving away a pack of Tim Holtz Word Sticks. I won’t even attempt to describe them – just click the link and check them out. The giveaway will end on Friday the 13th.

*resists the urge to say “May the odds be ever in your favor!”*

I spend way too much time online and I love getting free stuff. To be more precise, I love winning free stuff. Somehow, knowing that I beat several other people in my pursuit of free stuff makes it that much more enjoyable, even if my effort consisted of filling out a small form and posting a blurb on Twitter. Until it gets a bit warmer outside (I refuse to go out when it’s 50 degrees out – this is supposed to be Vegas, damn it!), I’ll concentrate my entrepreneurial efforts on entering every small-scale online giveaway with good odds (1:15 or better) I can find. I shall be assisted by my cranky old laptop, a fridge full of coke and a fairly advanced search script I came up with during one of my infamous bouts of insomnia.

I’ll be posting a fair amount of links to said giveaways here, as well as on my twitter account, so stay tuned – who knows, you might win something too!

I’m horrible at remembering anniversaries (as well as birthdays, weddings and funerals) – I’ve just realized that I missed the 6-month anniversary of my move to Vegas. Well, it’s been six months and five days, and let’s just say my first impression of this strange city was a bit off…

Yes, there’s eye candy. However, it stays indoors during the winter. This has been my first winter without any snow whatsoever (which is amazing, by the way), but it turns out Vegas isn’t hot 24/7/365. That’s something they don’t show on all those TV shows – this city gets a little chilly sometimes. I may be getting a bit spoiled here, but damn it, I thought Vegas always had the perfect sunny weather. Dust storms are pretty fun, though – the wind gets so strong that trucks flip over and entire trees get uprooted and fly around. Fun stuff.

The city itself is pretty huge… I never realized how good I had it in Reno, where almost everything was only five miles away (if that). Here you have to drive for ~20 minutes to get anywhere at all. The roads are great, but the drivers are terrible. Maybe they’re even more spoiled than I am by the very nearly perfect weather, but every time there’s any wind or even the slightest hint of rain, everybody slows down to 35mph, even if the speed limit is 50.

The real estate is still ridiculously cheap, but there’s an interesting caveat: it turns out that the only way to buy those dirt-cheap tiny $25,000 condos is if you have $25K in cash on you. Apparently, banks don’t like to issue mortgage loans for anything less than $50,000. Who knows, maybe I’ll take them up on that offer…

The people in Vegas (Vegasites? Vegans?) seem pretty average, but my data sample is relatively small. I find it interesting that the city that’s notorious for its risque shows and “anything goes” attitude is actually pretty conservative when you get past the Strip and Fremont Street. That’s not something you notice right away, but there are little signs here and there… I’ve got a great story to explain what I mean by that, but that would put this blog well into NC-17 category, and I want to keep it PG. At least for the time being…

A couple of weeks ago I was struck with a rare desire to organize my financial accounts. After spending an hour trying to recall the password to my 401k account with Vanguard and find my way through Schwab’s passive-aggressively counter-intuitive navigation menu, I ended up staring at all the pretty round numbers in my accounts, opting out of receiving paper statements from Schwab and spending 20 minutes on the phone with Vanguard and trying to prove that I am, in fact, me.

I thought that was the end of it, but that would have been way too easy, wouldn’t it? The other day I was feeling particularly adventurous and decided to venture out of my beloved apartment, risk the exposure to dust storms, bravely fight my way through 20 yards of urban Las Vegas and explore the quantum uncertainty that is my mailbox. (I don’t get out much…) Lo and behold – right next to the usual junk mail (death threats from creditors, love letters from stalkers, that kind of stuff) were three letters from Schwab and Vanguard. The white, crisp, official-looking envelopes bore a wide variety of stamped messages ranging from mildly cool (“Personal and Confidential”) to downright mysterious (“D/S Reading PA auth 2E-785”). My pupils dilated. My heart started racing. (Speaking of which, 120 beats per minute is about average, right?) My palms got sweaty. Excited, intrigued and horrified by mysteries the three letters may contain, I tore them open right there and then.

I read their contents. I re-read them. I sniffed them. I stopped just short of licking them because the only thing worse than getting a paper-cut on your tongue is getting an ice-cube-cut. (Don’t ask.) I shook the envelopes to see if the letters were merely a decoy cleverly designed to distract me from some secret object glued to the inside of the envelopes. They weren’t. I was left with no other option than to take the letters’ content seriously. Here is what they said:

“Dear Valued Client: Thank you for choosing Schwab eStatements. We received your request to stop paper delivery for your account,” said the letter from Schwab. Two of them, actually. Completely identical and printed on paper, thanking me for opting out of paper-based notifications. Smooth, Schwab. Very, very smooth. With my luck, the paper that was wasted on these letters probably came from a tropical rainforest tree that was cut down in its prime for the very purpose of thanking me for refusing to use paper – a tree that may have been vital to its tiny tropical rainforest biosphere and whose subsequent destruction may have set off a domino effect that will destroy South America’s economy, trigger World War III and leave the scant remnants of hitherto great civilizations wandering the radioactive landscape and asking their gods what they did to deserve such a fate. Great job, Schwab. I hope you’re happy, you genocidal paper fetishists.

The letter from Vanguard was only a little bit less likely to cause irreversible brain damage. A laconic tale of suspense and mystery, it described in stern, dry tone the saga of my unsuccessful attempts to guess the account password, their locking the account and subsequently restoring my access to the aforementioned account a few hours later. One could view this letter as a completely pointless and unnecessary waste of ink and paper which merely stated the obvious, but I like to think of it as the world’s shortest three-act play composed by Vanguard’s valiant Participant Services, whoever they may be. The titillating summary of those events was sent to me not by email, nor by fax, nor even voicemail, but by that most efficient of all communication media – snail mail.

But wait! That humble piece of paper has even more entertainment value to offer to the discerning reader. On the back side of the letter, the unsung heroes of Vanguard’s Participant Services created a piece of truly mind-bending, koan-worthy abstract post-modernist art. In the top left corner, there was Vanguard’s logo. Slightly to the right of it was the date the letter was printed. (For reasons that remain unknown, it hadn’t been mailed until two days later.) In the top right corner, “Page 2 of 2” insulted my AP-style sensibilities but appealed to my OCD nature. At the bottom of the page, the string of mysterious symbols read “017210 2- 2 8508 WEBL D1 1 X.” And at the very center of the page was the message whose existentially mind-boggling self-imposed contradiction rivaled those offered by the finest works of postmodern art. It resembled a Zen koan. It reminded me of the riddles and no-win scenarios we once discussed in my Bioethics class (which, incidentally, is the only college course I ever failed). In terms of absurdity, it was much like the set of instructions on a bag of toothpicks that drove one of the characters of Douglas Adams’ So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish insane. I’m sure that by this point you’re either at the edge of your seat, trembling with excitement, or waiting for the end of this tale of adventure, danger and 21st century’s bureaucracy, having come too far and wasted too much of your time to quit reading now. Well, wait no longer! The message that was printed in black size-12 Times New Roman font right in the middle of the otherwise mostly empty page read, “This page was intentionally left blank.”

And that, my friends, is the greatest piece of abstract art I have ever had the pleasure to see, let alone own. In fact, I’m probably going to frame it and hang it in my living room. Thank you, Vanguard Participant Services, for making my week! (And yes, I really am easily amused.)