Tag Archive: boredom


“bless your heart” – 449,000 search results on Google
“bless your stomach” – 34 search results
“bless your liver” – 27 search results
“bless your lungs” – 14 search results
“bless your bladder” – 6 search results
“bless your pancreas” – 6 search results
“bless your uterus” – 6 search results
“bless your kidney” – 3 search results
“bless your gallbladder” – 2 search results
“bless your small intestine” – 2 search results
“bless your spleen” – 2 search results
“bless your large intestine” – zero search results

 

“the heart wants what it wants” – 575,000 search results on Google
“the stomach wants what it wants” – 92 search results
“the brain wants what it wants” – 55 search results
“the liver wants what it wants” – 10 search results
“the lungs want what they want” – 8 search results
“the spleen wants what it wants” – 1 search result
“the appendix wants what it wants” – zero search results

“Chekhov’s gun” – 72,700 search results on Google
“Chekhov’s rifle” – 346 search results
“Chekhov’s shotgun” – 66 search results
“Chekhov’s cannon” – 36 search results
“Chekhov’s bazooka” – 23 search results
“Chekhov’s machine gun” – 21 search results
“Chekhov’s revolver” – 19 search results
“Chekhov’s flare gun” – 16 search results
“Chekhov’s stun gun” – 10 search results
“Chekhov’s howitzer” – 8 search results
“Chekhov’s nerf gun” – 8 search results
“Chekhov’s slingshot” – 7 search results
“Chekhov’s musket” – 6 search results
“Chekhov’s blaster” – 2 search results
“Chekhov’s carbine” – 2 search results
“Chekhov’s railgun” – 2 search results
“Chekhov’s BB gun” – 1 search result
“Chekhov’s dart gun” – 1 search result
“Chekhov’s derringer” – 1 search result
“Chekhov’s tranquilizer gun” – 1 search result
“Chekhov’s arquebus” – no search results

I want to be a stand-up comedian if I grow up. Might want to get insurance against pun-induced brain damage, though. Decisions, decisions…

iron punning

Kudos to Felicia Day for inspiring the pun barrage with this tweet.

“I am Iron Man” – 409,000 search results on Google
“I am Titanium Man” – 37 search results
“I am Tin Man” – 31 search results
“I am Aluminum Man” – 30 search results
“I am Silver Man” – 16 search results
“I am Copper Man” – 14 search results
“I am Golden Man” – 13 search results
“I am Magnesium Man” – 7 search results
“I am Cobalt Man” – 6 search results
“I am Platinum Man” – 5 search results
“I am Lithium Man” – 4 search results
“I am Nickel Man” – 3 search results
“I am Zinc Man” – 1 search result
“I am Palladium Man” – zero search results

“Happy cows” – 370,000 search results on Google
“Aggressive cows” – 5,390 search results
“Sad cows” – 4,680 search results
“Calm cows” – 2,930 search results
“Indifferent cows” – 1,460 search results
“Upset cows” – 1,300 search results
“Ecstatic cows” – 1,150 search results
“Arrogant cows” – 736 search results
“Languid cows” – 730 search results
“Jubilant cows” – 351 search results
“Needy cows” – 345 search results
“Flabbergasted cows” – 327 search results
“Opinionated cows” – 180 search results
“Vigilant cows” – 135 search results
“Malevolent cows” – 112 search results
“Enigmatic cows” – 78 search results
“Grouchy cows” – 69 search results
“Somber cows” – 64 search results
“Conscientious cows” – 54 search results
“Exuberant cows” – 43 search results
“Despondent cows” – 42 search results
“Petulant cows” – 32 search results
“Compulsive cows” – 15 search results
“Queasy cows” – 10 search results
“Tenacious cows” – 9 search results
“Disdainful cows” – 7 search results
“Wistful cows” – 6 search results
“Quixotic cows” – 4 search results
“Rancorous cows” – zero search results

“guitar hero” – 21,500,000 search results on Google
“piano hero” – 86,000 search results
“drum hero” – 59,800 search results
“ukulele hero” – 37,700 search results
“keyboard hero” – 36,600 search results
“keytar hero” – 27,000 search results
“theremin hero” – 25,500 search results
“vuvuzela hero” – 15,300 search results
“accordion hero” – 13,900 search results
“bagpipe hero” – 13,200 search results
“sitar hero” – 12,100 search results
“flute hero” – 11,000 search results
“bell hero” – 10,900 search results
“ocarina hero” – 10,200 search results
“banjo hero” – 10,100 search results
“violin hero” – 9,520 search results
“harmonica hero” – 8,220 search results
“saxophone hero” – 5,700 search results
“trumpet hero” – 5,400 search results
“lute hero” – 4,710 search results
“harp hero” – 4,250 search results
“tuba hero” – 3,760 search results
“trombone hero” – 2,900 search results
“cello hero” – 2,780 search results
“fiddle hero” – 2,650 search results
“balalaika hero” – 2,030 search results
“clarinet hero” – 1,570 search results
“xylophone hero” – 1,310 search results
“synthesizer hero” – 1,080 search results
“bugle hero” – 623 search results
“shofar hero” – 585 search results
“didgeridoo hero” – 533 search results
“gong hero” – 526 search results
“oboe hero” – 502 search results
“conch hero” – 74 search results
“cymbal hero” – 50 search results
“autoharp hero” – 21 search results
“mellotron hero” – 14 search results
“clavichord hero” – 12 search results
“omnichord hero” – 5 search results
“steelpan hero” – 2 search results
“pyrophone hero” – zero search results

“a moment of silence” – 43,700,000 search results on Google
“a day of silence” – 1,500,000 results
“a minute of silence” – 527,000 results
“a second of silence” – 366,000 results
“a year of silence” – 344,000 results
“a century of silence” – 334,000 results
“a decade of silence” – 234,000 results
“an hour of silence” – 226,000 results
“a month of silence” – 120,000 results
“an era of silence” – 96 results
“a quarter of silence” – 80 results
“a fortnight of silence” – 70 results
“a millennium of silence” – 57 results
“an eon of silence” – 39 results
“an epoch of silence” – 31 results
“a score of silence” – 23 results
“a Planck time unit of silence” – zero results

“The Space Needle” – 3,060,000 search results on Google
“The Space Button” – 2,530,000 search results
“The Space Thread” – 751,000 search results
“The Space Tape” – 30,200 search results
“The Space Ruler” – 74 search results
“The Space Pin” – 72 search results
“The Space Iron” – 48 search results
“The Space Ribbon” – 41 search results
“The Space Cutter” – 24 search results
“The Space Chalk” – 19 search results
“The Space Bobbin” – 16 search results
“The Space Thimble” – 9 search results
“The Space Shears” – 7 search results
“The Space Scissors” – 10 search results
“The Space Pincushion” – 1 search result
“The Space Threader” – zero search results