Grigory Lukin.com

At some point after waterboarding me at a Greek Orthodox baptism ceremony, my parents had the bright idea to take me on a trip to the countryside to show me what that whole “nature” thing was about. It was there that I saw a cow for the very first time in my life. A giant, horned, foul monster surrounded by clouds upon clouds of flies. Unaware of the sheer horror – nay, terror! – that gripped my tiny 3-year-old heart, my parents pushed me closer to that vile monster and said, “See, this is where milk comes from!” It was on that day that I declared a boycott on all milk, as well as vanilla-tasting dairy products. My parents made a valiant effort to change my mind and explain that cows are our friends, but by that point it was far too late. The damage had been done and my mind was made up…

Seeing as now, 23 years later, I’m 6’2″ and have never broken a single bone, I’m pretty sure the whole “milk is good for you” thing is a damn dirty lie perpetuated by the Big Dairy. *shakes fist at the Dairy-Industrial Complex*

Madness.

If I try really hard, I may understand the mental processes of people who shoot their coworkers or movie fans. This, however, is just madness. Psychos across the country trying to one-up one another; the most fundamental human rules (protect the little ones) being blatantly, arrogantly disregarded. I am an atheist, so please forgive the irony when I ask this, but is nothing sacred anymore?

Is this the beginning of the end for this country? Or did we miss it? Did the end begin years ago, when no one was looking? Is it too late, and are we surely and inevitably approaching the final destination, beyond whatever hope for redemption we may have had?

Sometimes I daydream about migrating once again and moving to another country. Someplace cheaper, friendlier, safer. Today’s events may be the motivation I need to start turning those daydreams into plans. There is no safety here. Only madness.

Have I ever mentioned that I’m a pedophobe? Those little buggers freak me out. Anatomically, they look like miniature adults. Mentally, however, they’re not even close. They can run around, hit their head on a desk, cry about it – and then do the exact same thing five minutes later! There is no spark of reason, no sentience or sapience (or whatever you want to call it) until they’re seven, or 10, or never, in some particularly bad cases. That scares the hell out of me – those tiny humans who behave so unhumanlike, all action and no reason. And before you ask – yes, I used to be a kid myself; no, I don’t relish the experience.

This is only one out of many reasons why I choose to be child-free. If, due to some bizarre development, I decide I want to have children after all, I’ll just host a high school exchange student from another country. I figure living with a teenager for several months should cure me of any and all obsession with having kids.

(Another reason is the fact that I grew up next to a malfunctioning nuclear power plant. My DNA has more glitches than the beta version of Windows-95, which makes procreation a spectacularly bad idea.)

“If you’re not with us, you’re against us. Huh. If you’re not an apple, you’re a banana…”
Terry Pratchett, “Thud!”

I’m a bad atheist. I don’t read all the trendy atheist blogs, I don’t subscribe to “freethinker” magazines, I rarely attend rallies and I don’t keep up on atheism-related current affairs. That’s why this article on Atheism+ came as such a surprise. At first, I couldn’t quite believe what I’d just read. Then I spent several minutes staring at the screen and muttering “no no no no no”…

Why? Read the article to get a quick 411 on the issue. The tl;dr version is as follows: a number of prominent atheists designed a movement “for people to discuss how religion affects everyone and to apply skepticism and critical thinking to everything, including social issues like sexism, racism, GLBT issues, politics, poverty, and crime.” (source) What exactly does this mean? In the words of the blogger Greta Christina, it’s quite simple: 

I am not saying that atheists who don’t care about social justice are not true atheists. I’m saying that atheists who don’t care about social justiceshould care about social justice. Logically, and morally. (source)

Sounds mostly harmless, right? PZ Myers, arguably the Internet’s most prominent atheist blogger, clarifies it further in this brief but poignant kinda-sorta-not-really FAQ: The movement “is only starting to coalesce. There are no leaders, no organization behind it, no money, no coercive power at all. It’s entirely spontaneous. Currently it’s little more than a label. […] There’s no religious mentality at all in Atheism+” but “[p]eople who are embracing Atheism+ as a label think atheism ought to similarly incorporate social values.” (Conformity doesn’t sound like religion at all…)

If you think that simply not believing in God is enough to be an atheist, “that’s just stupid. There are lots of atheists who take this blinkered stance that atheism is just one specific idea about rejecting god-belief, and it has absolutely no philosophical foundation and should have no political or social consequences.” 

In response to the accusation of a “you’re either with us or against us” mentality, Dr.Myers assures us that “[i]t’s entirely opt-in.” My favorite part is where he says that “If you agree with that [ Atheism ought to be a progressive social movement in addition to being a philosophical and scientific position, because living in a godless universe means something to humanity.], you’re an atheist+. … And if you don’t agree with any of that — and this is the only ‘divisive’ part — then you’re an asshole.”

To sum this up, if you don’t want to be an activist atheist and if mere lack of belief in God is enough for you, you’re “just stupid.” And if you don’t want to join the cool kids’ club, even if you have reservations and valid arguments, you’re an asshole. Either with us or against us. Black and white. Duality. Fallacy. Not a good way to make friends or convert the undecided, especially when addressing the people who encounter more than enough hate and ignorance on daily basis as it is.

What’s my take on it? I’m an atheist and I’m a progressive person – I believe in equal pay, equal rights, the right to marry whomever you want, etc. I volunteer in my community, go to political protests to fight the good fight and will vote for the progressive presidential candidate in November. With that said, I do not want to be part of the Atheism+ movement. Why? Because I don’t need to join a movement in order to continue doing what I already do. Because I will gain nothing from joining their group. Because it would be redundant – I’ve been a progressive atheist for a long, long time before they came along and I’ve been doing just fine. Because I shall not join any group whose spokesperson (and that’s what Dr.Myers is) sees his constituency in black and white and uses petty schoolyard insults to insult those who dare disagree, regardless of their motivation. 

There are many other reasons – this is just off the top of my head. I support efforts to educate the public about atheism. Hell, I even wrote an e-book for that very purpose! I do not support divisive tactics and “with us or against us” ultimatums. I agree that there are atheists who are bigoted, close-minded or not very bright, but to paint all of your opposition in one color and declare them to be stupid assholes? That’s just ridiculous. I’ve just realized one final – and biggest – reason I shall never join any atheist organization that uses divisive tactics or otherwise limits its membership: any sufficiently large organization loses its focus and becomes corrupt. The Catholic church and its pedophile scandals. The Democratic party and their willingness to compromise on torture. Even charities aren’t immune – here’s a list of the 25 highest-paid charity CEOs. It’s entropy, pure and simple. It’s inevitable. Show me a single large organization that’s been around for a few decades and hasn’t succumbed to corruption. Show me just one. Atheism+ is just another such organization: a group with admittedly noble motives and undeniably foul-mouthed champions; a movement that divides as it attempts to unite; a good idea poorly executed.

I wish Atheism+ the best of luck but I won’t be joining them. I agree with their long-term goals but I won’t be associated with George W Bush impersonators. I’ll just keep doing my progressive work by myself, thank you very much. But then again, what do I know? I’m just a stupid asshole.

Right now, I’m on a sabbatical from work to decompress, catch up on my sleep and maybe – just maybe – find a better job. Two weeks down, four to go and no luck so far. Filling out applications and going to interviews takes up surprisingly little time, so I spent most of the last two weeks reliving my childhood by playing Diablo-2. (I shall not buy the abomination that is Diablo-3 until it becomes accessible in the offline, single-player mode.) Unfortunately, it is possible to have too much of a good thing. In other words, I got bored.

I’m still trying to figure out the exact set of conditions I need to get in a writing mood. Not just any writing mood, mind you, but the kind of mood where I sit down and type up an entire e-book in one night. The “all or nothing” kind of mood. Well, it looks like boredom and restlessness are vital ingredients of this strange headspace of mine. That, combined with a complete lack of anything productive to do, finally gave me the push to pull one of my infamous all-nighters. All it took was a can of NOS (260mg of caffeine, the equivalent of 3.25 cans of RedBull), a bunch of fried eggs&pasta (a recipe I invented, as far as I know), and a mix of TPachelbel Canon in D Major, theme music for Discworld Noir and all the techno Pandora has to offer playing in the background. It took me 10 hours but I finished editing one of my less known e-books and completed a brand new one! (And there was much rejoicing.)

I just need to add a few final touches and then Taoism-101: Answers and Explanations will be unleashed on the Internets! Yep, that there was one productive all-nighter.

Today begins my five-day-long promotion: I’m giving away my e-book “Go to college without going broke.” If you’re reading this, you probably followed the link at the end of the book – well, I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Can you do me a favor? Click on the link and leave a quick review, preferably one with four or five stars. *g*

Why am I giving it away? I’d be lying if I said my intentions are purely altruistic: the sales could use a little boost, and I’m anticipating a small spike in profits once this promotion ends. Aside from that, though, I really do wish to help all the college students out there. I wish I had a guide like this when I went to college… The information in my book is hardly unique – I’m sure most of it can be found online. However, if I know anything at all about human psychology, it’s that people would rather download (and hopefully read at some point) something that’s being given away for free than do their own research. Heh…

The first time I did this promotion, back in January, I gave away over 15,000 downloads. Here is hoping it’ll generate the same interest this time. If even a hundred people follow my advice and save at least $1,000 each, I’ll be a happy camper. Enjoy!